Tuesday, January 16, 2007

it's a tuesday after a long weekend - and it's back to work

ugh, so i don't really like my job. it's weird cause i thought my job was good until a few weeks ago. but now i'm bored with it. compared to many other jobs, it's not that bad. i get to talk to creative directors, producers, and product managers at major companies. i talk on the phone and write emails and sit in meetings and sometimes go to commercial shoots, which is the fun part.

i didn't grow up in an artistic household. business was the natural direction to go in, so i went to a business school. i didn't like the school, but that's another story. i enjoyed the marketing classes and was set on pursuing that when i graduated. when i moved to ny, i thought working in advertising would be a fun job related to marketing, so that's what i did.

most of my friends are people i've worked with, so i am very grateful for that and i have had great opportunities in my job, but i'm just not motivated anymore. i know so many other people feel this way and i thought i'd be different and be someone who can enjoy their job. but now i feel like it's just a job, work, a place to be during the day. sometimes at work i listen to people talk and go back and forth over something and i just think how weird it is that people care so much. work is weird that way. i'm not a slacker and i do a good job and i'll stay late if i need to, but i don't really care. i definately need the money and i want to do well at my job, so i can make more money, but i guess that's my only motivation at this point, which i'm not really proud of.

today i thought about other jobs i would be interested in. i wish i could start over again with what i know now and go back to undergrad school. it's not fair to make 18 year olds decide what career path they want in life. i can't believe how much more i've learned since then. if i could go back and get my undergrad degree, i would not go to a business school. i would go to a liberal arts school and pursue something more creative, like writing or film.

today i researched jobs i think i would like. i looked into becoming a producer, a writer, or working in artist/talent development at a record label. i know, i'm young and single and don't have any responsiblities, so why not go back to school or get an internship somehere? i guess the truth is that i'm lazy and i don't hate my job that much.

i just started my newest job 5 months ago after interviewing on and off for a year and a half. it's tiring interviewing and every job i'm interested in has so much competition. and the reality is that what counts in my career now is experience. you don't need a graduate degree, it's industry experience that matters. and i got a good start to the industry. i started 3 months out of school and got promoted pretty quickly. i'm confident i'll get a raise over the summer when i get my review and i'll be farther ahead in the career path i'm in now than if i started something new tomorrow. i guess it's just one of the realities of life. no one really likes their job. that's why it's important to like the people you work with and to have a life outside of work. my job isn't awful, my hours are decent, and i'm comfortable right now with my salary. those things matter, i just wonder if it could have been better. but who knows, cause the grass is always greener on the other side.

2 comments:

megabrooke said...

I feel very similarly to you.
You're right- the grass is always greener- always want what you don't have.
That's why though, it's cool you're looking into night classes in writing, etc. to broaden your horizons. I'm doing the same thing.

Anonymous said...

I hear ya. I've known what I've wanted to do since I was 10, and that's writing. Though, my degree is in Elementary Education and Psych, for this I blame my mother. My dream job is to be a playwright and author. So, come June I'll be attending writing classes at NYU. You may be content now, but don't settle for contentment. Do what you love, you'll be happier.